Filed under: introduction
I guess I’ll start by admitting that I <3 infomercials, especially food related ones, the more disgusting the better. I love that super juicer; that gross, meaty rotisserie oven thing; the pasta tube and especially that steamer thing. You know, the one where they made a cake using cake mix and diet orange soda? But my all-time favorite, and obsession for the last few years, is the GT Xpress 101, endorsed by Cathy Mitchell: TV Personality and Food Expert

Basically, it’s like any other sort of Foreman Grill type food cooker. It heats on the top and the bottom, but the catch is, ALL YOUR FOOD COMES OUT IN A SEMICIRCLE! And if that isn’t awesome enough, it comes with glorious recipes like Stuffed Soup, Beef Wrapped Asparagus and Sloppy Joe and Egg Breakfast Pie.
Stuffed Soup
1 can prepared chicken and corn chowder
2 1/2 cups chicken-flavored dry stuffing mix
3 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
Combine all ingredients. Spoon 3/4 cup of mixture into each well.
Cook 7 minutes, or until golden brown. Repeat and cook the remaining two servings. Serves 4.
Genius!
And lucky me, thanks to my cousin Diane who also has a sick sense of humor, I am now the proud owner of one GT Xpress 101.
This blog will be dedicated to my adventures making vegan, semicircular food in this device. I will try and replicate some of the recipes that came in the handy cookbook and also create my own semicircular dishes.
Coming soon: Apple Blueberry Moon Pies
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Are you mad?? Apple Blueberry Moon Pies simply cannot be made in semicircular format! You canna change the laws of Physics!
Comment by jzn November 28, 2007 @ 5:15 amMaybe try making them as regular circles first? Then work your way to semi?
Comment by isachandra November 28, 2007 @ 6:33 ammaybe we should have a semi-circular bake off! i will win in the “gross and over cooked” category.
Comment by Eve November 28, 2007 @ 7:52 amWhen science can make toast semi circular then and only then will I subscribe to your cockamamie (that HAS to be spelled wrong!) semi-circular food ways!
Comment by Tekatana November 28, 2007 @ 12:19 pmoh my god. gory is going to love this. we watch this infomercial every saturday and sunday morning we spend together. gory can’t make it through the whole thing without wanting to barf.
Comment by esme November 28, 2007 @ 12:33 pmPaula, I’m really looking forward to future recipes — especially something as nasty as the grey, beef and asparagus roll-ups, stuffed into this unnatural shape.
Comment by Diane November 28, 2007 @ 12:58 pmThe whole world is waiting for blueberries.
Comment by isachandra November 28, 2007 @ 5:07 pmOh wow, the informercial for this was playing on a continual loop in a recent hotel stay, and I must say that I was completely mesmerized! So, yes to vegan semicircle food!
Comment by Leigh November 29, 2007 @ 10:19 pmThose look delicious! I have to stay tuned for the next semi-circular vegan extravaganza.
Comment by Amber November 30, 2007 @ 1:07 amPaula, I’m so proud of you!!!!! And with your new, short haircut, you look especially cute in the picture.
Good luck with your ‘blog.
Love, Mom
Comment by mom November 30, 2007 @ 4:11 pmThis is hilarious!
Comment by sockbuttons December 4, 2007 @ 1:59 pm